This week has been pretty hard for me. Some one closed to me has been hospitalized and I’m taking it pretty badly. Yes, he’s my brother. I don’t know what to do but feeling helpless. It’s probably because this is the first time I’m dealing with this sort of situation. I regretted all the nasty stuff I said to him. I never meant it but somehow it just blurted out. Me and my big mouth.
To my dearest brother,
Right now, all I wanted to say is I’m very sorry for all the nasty stuffs I said out of anger and mistreated you in any way. It seriously broke my heart when your hopes and dreams were shattered by this piece of news because I sincerely hope you will achieve your dreams some day.
Although you have to put a smile on your face but I know you are crying silently in your heart. You are a good and dedicated person. You have tried your very best to keep all of us happy and fulfill our requests no matter how unreasonable it is. Most important of all, you never even declined my requests, not even once. Just because you do not want me to be unhappy. I am really an asshole for taking you for granted.
Although I know you have forgiven me but I’m ashamed of myself. I still felt pretty bad when I’m supposed to be good and understanding towards your predicament but I did exactly the opposite. You are still young and you have a bright future ahead of you. I don’t understand what you did to deserve this. Yes, I broke into tears after receiving the dreaded phone call. After the first call, I became very phobic of receiving every incoming phone calls.
Every time the phone rings, my heart dropped. I’m very afraid to hear all the bad news but I know I have to deal with it. It’s been a very long since the last time I actually cried my heart out. Fortunately, there was a particular song that soothed my heart. It’s your favorite song. I hope you don’t mind I’m re-dedicating this song to you.
Hillsong - From The Inside OutÂ
A thousand times I've failed Still Your mercy remains And should I stumble again I'm caught in Your grace Everlasting Your light will shine when all else fades Never ending Your glory goes beyond all fame Your will above all else My purpose remains The art of losing myself In bringing You praise Everlasting Your light will shine when all else fades Never ending Your glory goes beyond all fame In my heart and my soul Lord I give You control Consume me from the inside out Lord let justice and praise Become my embrace To love you from the inside out Everlasting Your light will shine when all else fades Never ending Your glory goes beyond all fame And the cry of my heart Is to bring You praise From the inside out Lord my soul cries out
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nN7b8BC65eg
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