Goofing around at the so called Venice of The East

December 28, 2007

I think something what the majority of young Malaysians would not do today. I walked under the hot scorching sun even though I can easily drive. But you know lah, when you hear grand fuckers in the Parliament who said they are going to increase the electricity tariff and petrol next year, this is the best time to practice walking.

So where are the good places to walk in Malacca? Well any places you walked without being hit by a speeding car is consider a good walk. So I chose this place. This is Malacca river 50 years ago. Okay I lied. It’s just another black and white effect i tested out and this shot turned out to be nice.

This place is recommended if you do not mind the longkang water smell along your journey. One would wonder if Malacca river is a large longkang in disguise. But compare to several years ago, it was much worst. People still come to this river to fish though. 30 years ago, it is so much easier to catch fishes from this river. Fast forward 30 years, plastic fishes like the one on the bottom are abundant.

Hey plastic fishes are so abundant there is a specialized sampan for them to hunt them down.

As I was walking along the river, I noticed something new. This river has finally become a busy transit for boats. Not fishermen boats, more like tourist boats. Ever since Malacca river was declared as the self-proclaimed Venice of the East, such boats are a common sight.

Next time I should try riding on one of them. I am embarrassed to say, although I have lived in Malacca for almost 27 years excluding 9 months I spent in my mother’s womb, I have never ride a boat in this river. It is weird because I had ride the stupid boat at Mines Slumberland but not Malacca.

In the past, it is blasphemous to name a boat after a famous bendahara

These boats are no ordinary boats because it acts like a town bus. Don’t believe me? You can see secara selambanya this boat parked on the side of this river, carrying extra passengers. I can hear the boat operator shouted at the guy “Woi lahanat, mau naik tak?!?”. Malaysian courtesy at its best.

Then hor, this boat can gostan and accelerate some more. Bloody hell, luckily I don’t have to shower tonight.

So next time when it floods again, we can ride town boat to work ok? I mentioned earlier that this river has become very busy. I said so because I can see at least two boats of the same model cruising on the river against each other. When there are too many boats on a river, there are bound to be accidents and mishaps. Although I did not see any accidents today but I spotted a boat that was in peculiar position.

At first I thought the boat operator wanted the bring the passengers to try Malacca sunbathing. But it turned out that this boat was out of fuel. How I know? I can hear the boat operator shouting on his cellphone for his fuel, coupled with strings of profanity as usual.

He should thankful that the boat was only out of fuel and they are not stranded in the violent ocean. Otherwise many people are going to jump into the sea before the boat sinks. In this situation, the passengers can just jump to the kampung. Jack and Rose of the Titanic fame was not spotted by the way. I would voluntarily throw them out from my boat if I ever have passengers like Jack asses and Rose. I have to snap this photo from this angle because the path way was covered with plants.

Traveling from this path way is not boring because you get to see beautiful Malay Village on the other side of the river. Remember to bring insects repellent though. They can be quite a nuisance with all the thick plants around. If you don’t want them to suck your blood like a bunch of insect piranhas, please bring your own repellents. Or you can pretend you are visiting Insect Park for free. You can find lots of interesting structures here.

You can find patriotic houses that are still in the mood for Merdeka.

You can find nice suraus here.

You can even find an accidental temple in this secluded spot.

You can also enjoy Malacca’s limited skyline from this path way with a bird trying to do a suicide attack against the hotel on the right. Don’t laugh, these are some of the tallest buildings in Malacca. But soon the title is going to be taken over by ~~Penis~~ Keris Tower.

Don’t worry about falling into the river because you’d be rescued immediately and transported to the hospital which is the grey building on the left in a flash. Pretty convenient, don’t you think? There’s a catch though. It only applies when some one spotted you falling into the river.

Nothing I can say about this photo but it’s my favorite noob shot.

One last thing I would like to say, couples can perform their paranormal activities here because it looked something like this at night. Once again, Please remember the insect repellents if you do not want them to bite your naked ass. Brought to you by your unfriendly neighborhood stalkerazzi.

Technorati Tags: Malacca river, Medan Selera Bunga Raya, tourism, boats, flood, insects, Malacca