the best place to get yourself sprayed with artificial cum

February 1, 2008

Long before I came to Singapore, I always heard from my friends that Orchard Road is the best place to go during Christmas. I am not sure what they meant by best. But I do know it’s the best place to get yourself sprayed with artificial cum. No, you do not need to bent down in order to receive their protein by the way.

They will spray you with cans. I don’t know if they spray cars in Singapore. But in Malaysia, these bunch of assholes have no mercy for passing cars. Look, not every one is in the mood of spraying shit when they are stuck in traffic jam indirectly caused by you ok?

You are adding to their frustration if you think its fun to spray their cars. Well that’s in Malaysia. I am not too sure what they do in Singapore. But Orchard road is a nice to place to go. It is even nicer when you are armed with a truck load of cash because it’s the heaven of expensive shopping.

If you do not have much cash with you, you can always enjoy the lighting sceneries for Christmas. It’s free and it’s beautiful. Much to my awe because I hardly find any streets in Malaysia that is fully decorated for christmas alone.

I love what I see here and I don’t care if I am acting like a jakun. Hmmm other than lightings, you can see scores of chicks here. So it’s like shooting two big birds with one stone here.

So cruel, they ‘imprisoned’ a ballerina in a jar. What’s the number if I want to make a report against animal cruelty? Oops, ballerina is not an animal.

While I was walking up to this road, I bumped into an old Malay friend of mine. I haven’t seen him for the last 10 years after graduating from secondary school and now I bumped into him in Singapore. Damn coincident eh? Of all places, I saw him in Singapore. He told me he’s working as a chef. Good for him. Chatted a while before we went our separate ways.

I only thought this nation is republic. I didn’t know the food chain is republic too. Do they have the head chef as their President?

I saw this huge Christmas tree in takashimaya (was it takashimaya?) and I was really mesmerized by the sparkling balls. They are so colourful and they are so…… huge?

You don’t get to see many balls gathering and trees erected up to the ceiling every day at the same time.

There are large xmas trees every where and they come in various colors.

I practically caused human congestion by standing on this spot for 5 seconds. Luckily I did not die in the stampede.

So that concludes my trip at Orchard Road. Although it was brief but it’s fun to catch the beautiful and colorful decoration for the once in a year event. You probably won’t find a better day other than Christmas to pay a visit to Orchard because I am generally not interested in modern buildings, sky scrapers and yada yada.