Our country seem to be obsessed in having the all longest, biggest things in the world. But things that holds the smallest record do not normally fared as well as its gargantuan counterpart. Sadly, big and long signifies the glory of our country. By being small, it does not justify the country’s image although in reality we are quite small but we still pretended to be big.
Ever since I was a teenager, I did not understand why we had our own Malaysian Record books other than Guinness but I used to be part of the stupidity who were actually proud of this achievement. I came to realise its stupidity as I grew older, bigger, wider, fatter, and none the wiser. Come to think of it, our record holders are pretty unique.
- We have the longest political banner in the world and some say Malaysia.
- We have the largest roti canai in the world and some say Malaysia,
- We have the largest Yee Sang (don’t ask me to translate this in English) in the world and some say Malaysia,
- We have the widest handphone coverage in the world (this is a lie) and some say Malaysia.
- We have the most annoying yellow mascot in the world and some say Malaysia.
- We have our OWN court fixing conspirators in the world and some say Malaysia.
- We have one of the highest absent minded rate in the world and some say Amnesia.
- We have our very FIRST and OWN national car in Proton and some say sia sia.
Perodua (localized name of Pro 2) is not counted because 51% owned by AV stars so it’s not patriotic enough to qualify itself to become a pseudo national car.
- We have one of the largest number of phantom voters in the world and the EC insist they are manusia.
Record holders are assured in keeping their records for a very long time because you can be damn sure that no one else is stupid enough in trying to break your record. Hence, it hasten the birth of Malaysian Book of Records because Guinness manage to detect the absurdity even 100 miles away.
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